Now if you think you know what it takes to fall in love, think again.
Author Ted Scheinman tweeted this napkin o’ knowledge, explaining it is “the best thing you will read all day: two of my sister’s 2nd graders on ‘how to fall in love.'”
Falling in love requires all of the sex. All of it. Well, definitely more than you’d expect a grade schooler to know about.
The full guide:
1. First you stare at the person.
2. You get close to each other.
3. You ask for a date.
4. You go in bed and do sex.
5. When you kiss you suck and lick.
6. Get nacked [sic] in bed and do more sex.
8. Go dance and put your noses together.
10. Then kiss forever.
11. Take a shower together and kiss.
12. Give each other rings.
13. Go to the pool together.
Now, there were written by 8year olds. Imagine what people twice their aggressive would think.
Now I’m thinking, Nothing New under the Sun.